Aren't we living in a society that keeps on telling us stereotypes and to live the so-called ideal life? Or is it just me? Or is it that the 'ideal life' is the one that society expects? The way you dress, the majors you choose, the music you listen to, what you believe in... funny how we know what exactly we want but we're pressured to fulfill people's pleasure.

Later on we ended up stumbling upon our own steps and clueless of what we want then. Oh and the only ideal life that I can agree with is probably the one related to the health. That's it. The others are dynamic and nobody get's to tell anybody of how you get to live the ideal life.

Labels, labels, labels. Everything is labeled by the society. Funny how they feel like they know how to tell if some things are normal, ugly, disgusting, unusual. So what if we don't run for the life that the society's striving for? We all have our own 'ideal' and frankly we shouldn't let society's norm screw us. They'd raise their eyebrows to the kids who doesn't go to regular school, or people who really enjoys their solitary rituals. No wonder that to some people I've been an alien all my life.

Why does she write all the time?

Why couldn't she ask her friends to come along and watch movies together instead of alone?

Why does she choose to live apart from her parents and family?

How could she possibly enjoying her plate of hainan chicken rice... alone?

How could she possibly go all cheapskate at that old, dirty secondhand market?

Where's the good in going out to markets on weekend?

I read your blog and I'm very sorry. You must have gone through a lot. You'll get through this, I know you can.

It is really mindfucking to see people's terribly pitiful reactions towards things that make me actually happy. So what if I'm drowning in my own sea? Like you're gonna care? I don't think so.

In all seriousness, though..., why, society? Why?!

I mean, look, I appreciate your sympathy and all but don't dramatize it, honestly

All my life I have been happy. But I am happier now so why worry? I have my own standards of the happy state and I proudly live by it. Nah, I cannot put up with small talks, I do not like to be obliged to tell certain people where I am, what I am up to, when will I get home, etc. The second a person sees my life as a misfortune, and one starts to hate me because of my unusually usual lifestyle, that's the moment my party starts. Never a day I'm gonna need anybody's approval. Man, I live to grow. You didn't have to tell me I'm burning down because that could be true, except I'm only burning up. I have vowed to myself that for whatever it is in my life, I shall be grateful. Safe to say that now I feel a hundred times happier when I know that I don't have to fit in a certain standard. I am out of an absolutely toxic relationship and I am ready to learn even more things alone.

And to my unusually usual habits and choices, I can't even bother to listen to what people say. Pray for them a good day, that's it. Walk on and make more people smile. I am so, very thankful to the fact that although I don't have bunches of friends around (I bet you know why), the ones around are the best I could ever found. They're very supportive, they'd be shocked with what I choose, once, but they'd understand eventually. I realized that I tried so hard to meet people's expectation that I started to lost myself and who I am. And it was terrrrrrible with six r's.

There's no more fear to say no to things that I don't like or hell-yes to exciting adventures because there are for sure so much to life rather than being trapped in a dead-end. Now that I can finally run for what I strive for, I'm never gonna stop. I learned a lot from the past, though, that hatred and revenge will never ever solve a problem. So why don't I just accept the fact and start over new, fresh as a daisy? Enough wasted days, I'm about to make my way.

Spreading good vibes,

Sarita Ayas

photo source: tumblr